Love and Will: Pursuing Saffron and Family

Gurashi

(forgive me for uploading all these loggies all at once on the same night! These are from the earlier parts of May, before Xiran and Synl's wedding. I don't know why that has become my point of reference but it was a big deal to me so maybe that's why LOL)

Some RP background: while Gurashi can freely swap between changeling shapes for the most part, but some are 'triggered' by intense emotional outbursts. Feelings of intense shame/guilt are associated with viscanti for them, and so earlier this year they had their first breakdown after an unexpected aether conversation with an old friend. Thankfully @Tikki there to help keep them from getting too beat up! After a few IG months of being reaffirmed with love and comfort by people like @Tridemon and @Cheliyi they changed back to sileni, no harm done.

...until they had a SECOND freakout, triggered less by any singular incident and more just a slowly building bottle of emotion with a cap screwed on too tightly. After that bottle burst and they turned Viscanti again, they decided they did not have any TIME or PATIENCE to be disposed by their upsetti shape, so they tried to focus on the positive things like Order tasks... but somethings weigh too heavy on the mind. And so in a moment of exhausted desperation, Gurashi prayed to @Mysrai to ask for Their help. 

And They offered more than Gurashi ever expected... (logs abound!)

You have emoted: Gurashi looks up at Mysrai suddenly, gasping. "Please do not do anything to Xenthos!" They blurt out suddenly, raising their hands.

Mysrai pauses in Her attention to the moths, turning slowly towards you as Her third set of arms unclasp and reclasp behind Her back. She stares for a moment, and then asks, "Did you think I would?"

You think to yourself: *suddenly all that aching guilt that hangs around the thought turns to throbbing fear, foreign words chiding them softly, reminding of the damage done, the damage they continue to do--*.

 

You have emoted: Gurashi's chin quivers, and they stare back at Mysrai before shaking their head, looking down at their feet. "Of course not," They say, voice thin and high.

 

You have emoted: Gurashi glances up in response to conversations held over aethers unseen, folding one arm over their chest to squeeze the other. "...I do not know how to..." They start, their tail around their ankle squeezing and relaxing again as their expression contorts, discomfort seeping in.

 

Without Her usual slowness, Mysrai is before you, reaching out Her primary hand and pressing a thumb to your forehead. "Silence." It is a command, abrupt and whispered, but rings with a force that threatens to shake the very ground beneath your feet. "These poisons, in your head, they serve no purpose beyond pain. They are...so loud..." She smiles, wanly, and as Her thumb pulls away, the doubts and guilt remains but is muted - struggling like a wild animal against the padded bars of a gilded cage. "...that is better.... You can speak now, without being drowned out."

 

You stare blankly at Mysrai.

 

A strange moment passes where you realise that you cannot seem to remember the last few minutes, the spot in your memory slipping away from your grasp and only leaving you to recall the faintest scent of citrus.

Gurashi

Now. Because Mysrai is a heartbreaking mastermind, Their Beloved Best Bear Priest, Aschwar, was MEDDLING, and overheard the contents of Gurashi's prayer and decided to step in to try and help, because they LOVE Gurashi. They are bestest friends. They reached out to @Xenthos wondering if he might have a word with them about Gurashi, and well...

It turned out to be a much more personal topic than either of them expected.
(Xenthos's log, got permissions to post! )

An elegant charcoal moth origami package unfolds and sings to you, "Hello, mister sir Xenthos. It is me, Aschwar! You may remember me, because I am your son Gurashi's bestest friend. I was hoping that maybe I could talk to you, maybe in that inn that is at the foot of the big mountain the Shofets likes to go to? They have a swimmings hole there! We do not have to go swimmings, though, I would just like to have a talk with you. Thank you muchly!"

A hatched glass of sunset garnet falls out of an elegant charcoal moth origami package and into your hands.

An elegant charcoal moth origami package flutters apart in wisps of vellum as the last of its contents spill into your hands.

During this encounter, Gurashi was awake and entirely unawares to it going on! That is, until Aschwar's feelings about the encounter began to spill over into the Beloved aethers, and it was quite clear something was amiss. So Gurashi rushed to the Beloved Priest's villa to check on the tae'dae... (Beloved @Sulwh, having sensed the disturbance over the aethers, also showed up and helped lighten the mood!)

"It...it is too late. I already forgot." <-- I FORGOT TO POST THE RIGHT LINK, I am sorry, here is a working one ;w;

You see a tall man standing before you, though not nearly so tall as yourself. No emotion upon his face, or in his one eye as he says awful things, his words blurring against your ear.

Ocean waves echoing softly behind his voice, Tridemon Regalis, Keeper of Pure Waters says to Esei, "I don't know."

 

You think to yourself: *immediate recognition, looking at the man that Aschwar looks at - / X e n t h o s /!?*.

 

(Order): You say, "Dearest Aschwar ... Beloved Aschwar, that is..."

Gurashi

Concerned about the effects of the poppy milk and worried about both Gurashi and Aschwar, @Cheliyi and @Tridemon decided to drop in and see if the Best Bear Priest was home, and lo' and behold, they were. 

"MY MARIGOLDS!"
(Cheliyi's log and POV, had permission to post!)

Another perfect sip precedes Aschwar, the Ebongold Heart's answer, and they look entirely at peace as they do so; the gentle tilt of their head to inhale the aroma of the tea, the silence of their sip, and the almost imperceptible clink of cup against saucer. "It was. I know it happened, but I do not feels it no more. I cannot remember it." They place heavy emphasis on these last four words as they gently lower the saucer to the table, revealing that even those two sips were enough for their enormous mouth to have drained it to naught but the dregs.

 

Ocean waves echoing softly behind his voice, Tridemon Regalis, Keeper of Pure Waters says, "As if... it was a story someone told you, about someone else?"

 

You think to yourself: **another flicker of unease, but grave acknowledgement, they cannot... remember the pain. a good thing.**.

 

Aschwar, the Ebongold Heart pauses to consider this point, gently rubbing a long, golden claw over the petal of a poppy upon their scabbard. "Yes, sort of. Not like someone else told me, but like...I told me. I know it is true, but when I try to think more about it? There is just..." They trail off, clearly looking for words to express the experience.

Aschwar, the Ebongold Heart says, "It is like when you are walking near the waters, and it is very morning. And the clouds come off of the water, and they are so soft, and wet, and all around you. You cannot see anything else, no matter how hard you try, or how long you look."

 

Ocean waves echoing softly behind his voice, Tridemon Regalis, Keeper of Pure Waters says, "Nothing beyond the surface."

 

Aschwar, the Ebongold Heart nods twice towards Tridemon, a relieved smile upon their face. "Yes, I think that we are saying the same things."

Xiran

Posting with Gurashi's permission.

Tea and Hypothericals (Please use Mozilla Firefox if Chrome doesn't load)

You pour hot, spiced saffron tea from a bottle into a ceramic tea cup painted with faintly luminescent purple flowers.

Accepting the cup gingerly, Gurashi, The Heart's Friend says, "Oh! This looks wonderful."

You say, "Esei's brew. I think it's nice for wintertime."

Full-size sad Trill!Gurashi