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"Ask the Kiwi Guy"

KagatoKagato Auckland, New Zealand
edited June 2013 in The Funnies
Trying something here that I found picked up rather well on another forum I frequent...

Some of you may be familiar with a series of videos called "Ask That Guy With The Glasses" (sadly there has not been any updates in a while now) - This is pretty much a similar setup, you ask questions, doesn't matter how ridiculous they are (though they must be tasteful) - and I answer them - but be warned, the answer may not be what you expect!

I'll be pulling answers from the other site I do this thread on as well, when I do my video clips, so you may see some questions pop up that have not been asked here - I will generally do a video of about half a dozen or so questions and answers at a time.

Examples of some of the questions/answers I have fielded in my other thread:

Quote:
So you have that cute accent ... how you doing
Why I am quite well. I recently finished shooting a starring role in a small movie, curing 5 known forms of cancer and having lunch with the President of the United States. Simultaneously. How about you?

Quote:
are huntsman spiders really as creepy as they seem?
Naaaah! They are just misunderstood along with snakes, wetas and box jellyfish and just want nothing more than a big friendly hug...

Quote:
Are kiwi birds and bandicoots as adorable and cuddly as they seem?
In contrast to my previous comment, kiwis are simply acting cute and cuddly as a ploy while they plot with their evil kiwi overlords on the best way to overthrow our worlds governments and make us all their slaves. Personally I welcome our new kiwi overlords with open arms (please don't eat me >_>)

Quote:
Do you have the same problems with Drop Bears that Australia does?
No, we eradicated those nasty little blighters in the great war of the Australian and New Zealand Stereotypes. They are welcome to those zombie bears (It's a little known fact that they love brains... as a mid afternoon snack.)

Quote:
What is the average jumping distance a kangaroo covers in one leap?
Depends on how much dynamite you use to launch it.

Quote:
Can 1 + 1 = 10?
Not in our reality no, but it actually does in approximately 47 other alternate timelines. Strange huh?


Quote:
If pie is in the sky, where is cake?
*GLaDOS imitation* Cake will be served after you have assumed the party escort submission position. In accordance with testing protocols I will stop enhancing the truth in 3... 2... *static*
Never put passion before principle.  Even if you win, you lose.

If olive oil comes from olives, where does baby oil come from?

If vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat?

Comments

  • DelphasDelphas
    What was the most embarrassing thing you learned while playing D&D?
    </RANT>
  • MarcellaMarcella
    3.5, Pathfinder, 4.0 or some other abominable form of DnD is your favorite?
  • KalnidKalnid
    Has New Zealand ever lost a war against emus?
  • KagatoKagato Auckland, New Zealand
    edited December 2014
    Delphas said:
    What was the most embarrassing thing you learned while playing D&D?
    - Removed, reworking answer for vlog -
    Marcella said:
    3.5, Pathfinder, 4.0 or some other abominable form of DnD is your favorite?
    - Removed, reworking answer for vlog -
    Kalnid said:
    Has New Zealand ever lost a war against emus?
    - Removed, reworking answer for vlog -
    Never put passion before principle.  Even if you win, you lose.

    If olive oil comes from olives, where does baby oil come from?

    If vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat?
  • ShaddusShaddus , the Leper Messiah Outside your window.
    What have I got in my pocket?
    Everiine said: The reason population is low isn't because there are too many orgs. It's because so many facets of the game are outright broken and protected by those who benefit from it being that way. An overabundance of gimmicks (including game-breaking ones), artifacts that destroy any concept of balance, blatant pay-to-win features, and an obsession with convenience that makes few things actually worthwhile all contribute to the game's sad decline.
  • KagatoKagato Auckland, New Zealand
    edited December 2014
    Shaddus said:
    What have I got in my pocket?
    That makes 4 questions, a couple more and I'll make a video 'answering' them.  (I know I put up some answers earlier, but took them down and will re-answer them in the video)
    Never put passion before principle.  Even if you win, you lose.

    If olive oil comes from olives, where does baby oil come from?

    If vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat?
  • LeolaminsLeolamins
    Ok my question (and the question of most of Australia).  How many sheep does it take to satisfy a kiwi?

    image

    06/30/2014 19:37 Silvanus channels the power of the Megalith of Doom for you, stripping you of your Vernal Ascendant status.......bastard!!

  • DaganevDaganev
    Shaddus said:
    What have I got in my pocket?
    Clearly, there is a wocket in your pocket.
  • GabriellaGabriella
    Daganev said:


    Shaddus said:

    What have I got in my pocket?

    Clearly, there is a wocket in your pocket.



    Clearly it's the One Ring! *coughHobbitcough*

    Also, what direction does the water spin when you flush the toilet?
    --------
    "You are so much bigger than you think you are," She says, fervently. "You are a beacon of hope that shines through the world with every step you take. You are My beacon, Gabriella, and you shine even into the darkest of nightmares."
    --------
    The air sparkles with silver motes of light as a silken voice says, "You will see growth and strength where others will see weakness. You will walk with Us as a paragon of Serenwilde's power, for you have already walked this path before."
  • SvanaSvana
    Yeah, I've got a question. What's it like living so far north you've got orcs and hobbits and such?

    Also, what's it like having tourists in the dead of summer who don't constantly complain about how cold it is?
  • KagatoKagato Auckland, New Zealand
    Now that I am back in NZ, my overseas trip being over and done with and I have a decent number of questions to work with, I think I will start working on the video soon.  Will post a link to it here once it is edited and done - It should take about a week, pending how busy summer school turns out to be.
    Never put passion before principle.  Even if you win, you lose.

    If olive oil comes from olives, where does baby oil come from?

    If vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat?
  • DelphasDelphas
    About damn time, @Kagato, and don't be afraid to emote. Remember, this is a talkie!
    </RANT>
  • KagatoKagato Auckland, New Zealand
    Sorry the video has taken a little longer than expected,  I've gotten a fair chunk of it done between summer school and work, I hope to have it up soon >_>

    Sadly time estimates and actual complete timeframes seem to often be very different for me, particularly when I have assignments that determine if I pass or fail a paper due in at the same time :p
    Never put passion before principle.  Even if you win, you lose.

    If olive oil comes from olives, where does baby oil come from?

    If vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat?
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