My grandma went to the hospital last night after what sounded to me like a panic attack, but the actual stress of the situation seems to have made things worse. Not really sure what the situation is, and I'm at work, and there's a winter storm bearing down on us, so really nothing is going well right now.
I nearly had a public breakdown for the first time in a while, today. Thankfully the threat came when I was at my therapist's office, which is sort of like having a heart attack in a hospital in terms of location helpfulness, but it was still extremely unpleasant. I thought I had gotten better at managing these things, but I think the truth is that I was just going out less, so it was less likely I'd be out in public at any point I was struck by a panic. It is becoming increasingly clear to me that "pretend everything is okay for a bit" won't always be a viable solution for keeping it together when I have to leave the house for something.
(To add insult to injury, the road snails then made a 25 minute trip home take about 90 minutes instead. Cool.)
I nearly had a public breakdown for the first time in a while, today. Thankfully the threat came when I was at my therapist's office, which is sort of like having a heart attack in a hospital in terms of location helpfulness, but it was still extremely unpleasant. I thought I had gotten better at managing these things, but I think the truth is that I was just going out less, so it was less likely I'd be out in public at any point I was struck by a panic. It is becoming increasingly clear to me that "pretend everything is okay for a bit" won't always be a viable solution for keeping it together when I have to leave the house for something.
(To add insult to injury, the road snails then made a 25 minute trip home take about 90 minutes instead. Cool.)
About four weeks ago, I sent you a message containing some inspirational stuff. Did you ever get it?
Month-long trend has been being so exhausted from the week that on the one day that I have the most amount of time to get work done, I don't have the energy.
Exhaustion-induced breakdown imminent.
Edit: Though I suppose the upside of giving up on getting any work done tonight is getting to curl up on the couch and watch my favourite movies instead.
Tonight amidst the mountaintops And endless starless night Singing how the wind was lost Before an earthly flight
I nearly had a public breakdown for the first time in a while, today. Thankfully the threat came when I was at my therapist's office, which is sort of like having a heart attack in a hospital in terms of location helpfulness, but it was still extremely unpleasant. I thought I had gotten better at managing these things, but I think the truth is that I was just going out less, so it was less likely I'd be out in public at any point I was struck by a panic. It is becoming increasingly clear to me that "pretend everything is okay for a bit" won't always be a viable solution for keeping it together when I have to leave the house for something.
(To add insult to injury, the road snails then made a 25 minute trip home take about 90 minutes instead. Cool.)
About four weeks ago, I sent you a message containing some inspirational stuff. Did you ever get it?
Yeah, sorry I didn't reply. I don't know how to respond to those kinds of things. Unfortunately, I don't think inspirational stuff is going to magically make my longstanding psychological issues disappear.
(Edit: Did that sound catty? Sorry, not trying to sound catty. Conveying proper tone over text can be a pain.)
I nearly had a public breakdown for the first time in a while, today. Thankfully the threat came when I was at my therapist's office, which is sort of like having a heart attack in a hospital in terms of location helpfulness, but it was still extremely unpleasant. I thought I had gotten better at managing these things, but I think the truth is that I was just going out less, so it was less likely I'd be out in public at any point I was struck by a panic. It is becoming increasingly clear to me that "pretend everything is okay for a bit" won't always be a viable solution for keeping it together when I have to leave the house for something.
(To add insult to injury, the road snails then made a 25 minute trip home take about 90 minutes instead. Cool.)
About four weeks ago, I sent you a message containing some inspirational stuff. Did you ever get it?
Yeah, sorry I didn't reply. I don't know how to respond to those kinds of things. Unfortunately, I don't think inspirational stuff is going to magically make my longstanding psychological issues disappear.
(Edit: Did that sound catty? Sorry, not trying to sound catty. Conveying proper tone over text can be a pain.)
Nah, not catty. Just really sad and down I must do more inspirational stuff.
i'm having trouble letting go, even with the full knowledge of why i should do so.
that bitch is the sort of bitch who gets jealous at a drop of a hat and for no discernible reason other than 'i can and you're not friendly enough towards me and you don't buy me shiny things'.
i want to nothing to do with that sort of trash if i can help it. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- is the grass greener on the other side? do any of you experience shit like this too?
If you want nothing to do with her, then stop paying so much attention to her and thinking about how to "cut her down to size." You seem to have an unhealthy fixation on her, when all you have to do to remove her influence from your life is distance yourself and let it go. You aren't being forced to interact with them, you aren't obligated to acknowledge their existence. You "spotted them" on Facebook. This person is allowed to exist, whether you like them or not. Come to terms with it, and move on. Relax.
actually no. i do not have an unhealthy fixation on that bitch. It -that bitch- just popped up while browsing on facebook. i detest this person because it pulled me through some shady shenanigans that still affects my ability to make a living. thinking about it now makes my blood boil. secondly, from what i've found that the attitude it has seems to be a common one at a certain level. Thinking about finding ways to deal with that, reminds me of IT, that bitch, and makes my blood boil even further.
i just come here every so often to vent. nothing more.
@Eritheyl speaking from your experience, how effective is that? /Sarcarsm
is dead like the dodo
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Cyndarinused Flamethrower! It was super effective.
I was probably going to stay in today anyway, even if we hadn't gotten a foot of snow, but something about being unable to leave the house makes it super boring. My grandma's doing fine, though, so there's that.
Alpha Xaldrin Somnius, the Dreameater (Male Twisted Demigod). He is 224 years old, having been born on the 24th of Dvarsh, 213 years after the Coming of Estarra. He has cut his thread from the Tapestry of the Fates.
I despise being sick. Sinus infection that seems to be trying really hard to creep down my body. Hooray for zicam and cold and sinus meds. And an excuse to drink OJ and inhale vapor rub. But man, do I buy the weirdest crap at the grocery store when I'm like this.
Alpha Xaldrin Somnius, the Dreameater (Male Twisted Demigod). He is 224 years old, having been born on the 24th of Dvarsh, 213 years after the Coming of Estarra. He has cut his thread from the Tapestry of the Fates.
Getting off the bus today, someone touched me inappropriately so that was quite upsetting. Get into work to discover that the monitor for the computer is down and making some unpleasant sound. IT takes an hour and a half to get back to me, I get yelled at by someone who didn't want to have to pay with cash, and then I have to go on an adventure around the mall to find a replacement monitor, be forced to leave my store closed for half an hour while waiting to purchase a new one, come back to people lining up outside the door, then struggle to unhook the old one (the cable was screwed in so firmly, and the little cable protector was rusting so it was way harder than it should have been) then install the new one while trying not to die from inhaling all the dust back there. Apparently we're not allowed to clean behind the computers because we might break something. Ugh.
Wildeflower Aramel Strongleaf says to Xiran, "My cousin's attitude to life is rather like her attitude towards cake - to have everything, and at once, and lots of it."
Getting off the bus today, someone touched me inappropriately so that was quite upsetting. Get into work to discover that the monitor for the computer is down and making some unpleasant sound. IT takes an hour and a half to get back to me, I get yelled at by someone who didn't want to have to pay with cash, and then I have to go on an adventure around the mall to find a replacement monitor, be forced to leave my store closed for half an hour while waiting to purchase a new one, come back to people lining up outside the door, then struggle to unhook the old one (the cable was screwed in so firmly, and the little cable protector was rusting so it was way harder than it should have been) then install the new one while trying not to die from inhaling all the dust back there. Apparently we're not allowed to clean behind the computers because we might break something. Ugh.
Stomp hard, on the instep. Full weight of even a small girl/woman coming down on your instep is one of the more uniquely painful things to have happen to you. Bonus points if you're in heels. Double bonus points for stilettos.
Thanks for the advice, fellas. Remember girls, when you get sexually violated by strangers, it's your responsibility to attack first and register what is happening to you later!
Hey. Learning how to defend yourself is not a bad bit of advice to give. Just don't be psychotic about it, ladies.
Tonight amidst the mountaintops And endless starless night Singing how the wind was lost Before an earthly flight
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SylandraJoin Queue for Mafia GamesThe Last Mafia Game
Ymuli, I'm sorry all that happened to you. What would really be nice is if in public spaces other people called out when a jerk harasses you. When it happens you're usually so stunned you don't know how to react initially, and then you can't even think of what to say, and then you're afraid that if you do say something it'll only get worse. It's just... awful.
It's so wild to think most women encounter this at some point. I'll never forget when my younger sisters confided in me the first time something like this happened to them.
"Oh yeah, you're a naughty mayor, aren't you? Misfile that Form MA631-D. Comptroller Shevat's got a nice gemstone disc for you, but yer gonna have to beg for it."
I have an anxiety condition so I kinda just froze up and then went and hid in my locked store for a bit to have a quiet panic attack. I couldn't physically retaliate in any way for various reasons, so it's just... it makes you feel like rubbish when someone does it. Like, ugh. I am a person and I have the right to my own bodily autonomy. Why people feel as though they have the right to violate this autonomy baffles me. It's not like we have poor sexual education these days. It's sheer entitlement, apparently. Just ugh, people, ugh.
Wildeflower Aramel Strongleaf says to Xiran, "My cousin's attitude to life is rather like her attitude towards cake - to have everything, and at once, and lots of it."
Comments
Confused snail cars are -so cute though- nnghh
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it's saturday and my computer won't boot up.
Tonight amidst the mountaintops
And endless starless night
Singing how the wind was lost
Before an earthly flight
actually no. i do not have an unhealthy fixation on that bitch. It -that bitch- just popped up while browsing on facebook. i detest this person because it pulled me through some shady shenanigans that still affects my ability to make a living. thinking about it now makes my blood boil. secondly, from what i've found that the attitude it has seems to be a common one at a certain level. Thinking about finding ways to deal with that, reminds me of IT, that bitch, and makes my blood boil even further.
i just come here every so often to vent. nothing more.
@Eritheyl speaking from your experience, how effective is that? /Sarcarsm
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Estarra the Eternal says, "Give Shevat the floor please."
You tell Alpha Xaldrin Somnius, the Dreameater, "Nooo!"
You tell Alpha Xaldrin Somnius, the Dreameater, "You can't just leave .. who's going to call me adorable now?"
NOOOOO. @XALDRIN PLS COME BACK ;=;
Alpha Xaldrin Somnius, the Dreameater (Male Twisted Demigod).
He is 224 years old, having been born on the 24th of Dvarsh, 213 years after the Coming of Estarra.
He has cut his thread from the Tapestry of the Fates.
If you guys need me, I'll be drinking heavily.
Vive l'apostrophe!
Tonight amidst the mountaintops
And endless starless night
Singing how the wind was lost
Before an earthly flight
It's so wild to think most women encounter this at some point. I'll never forget when my younger sisters confided in me the first time something like this happened to them.
Vive l'apostrophe!